"The Miracle Of Peckham" was the 2nd episode of the 5th series of Only Fools And Horses. Derek "Del Boy" Trotter catches religion. He then discovers a Weeping Statue, and there is missing lead from the church roof and the statue weeps when it rains.
Rodney Trotter is slightly hungover after the night before. Albert Trotter shouts out for Del Boy. Rodney had woken Albert up last night by drunkenly blowing a stolen trumpet into Albert's ear when he was laying asleep in bed. Del mocks Rodney for dating a very tall woman who even called Rodney shorty. Helen of Croydon, her name was. Del says he is going to church today so Rodney has the morning off. Albert and Rodney wonder why Del has caught religion. His Cliff Richard cassette has gone as well. Albert says people can catch religion suddenly. Albert says he threw the trumpet down the dust chute, but the trumpet belongs to Biffo, a huge man, Rodney says. Rodney goes to collect it and it is all mangled. What looks like porridge comes rushing down the chute, covering Rodney.
Del is walking through Our Lady Of The Divine Rosemary church. He calls out to the vicar. Del goes into the confession box. Father O'Keith comes in. He is an Irishman. Del says he has come to confess his sins. He says he bought some gear off Sunglasses Ron and Paddy The Greek. He says they were stolen. Father gives his forgiveness.
As they exit the confession box, the vicar says that a local hospice, St Mary's Hospice is facing closure unless over £125'000 can be raised to repair it. The vicar says they have little or no chance of reaching their target. Del says goodbye to the vicar but the vicar notices the Weeping Madonna. A weeping statue, The Miracle. Del sees a money making opportunity, the media around the world will pay through their noses to get photos. They can then raise the money to save the hospice.
Back at the flat, Del calls Rodney to get onto Reuters, Tass and Peckham Echo as he has seen a Miracle. Rodney says to Albert that Del is pulling a stroke, as bishops and archdeacons have been in the business all their life and never seen a miracle, yet Del Boy shows interest in God and a day or two later spots a Miracle. Rodney wonders how Del is going to make money out of the church.
A week or so later, many journalists and photographers from around the world are waiting for another chance to see the weeping statue. Del says a miracle is due again soon. The statue starts weeping. As they leave, Del is interviewed by a news reporter from NBC New York. In the church Albert is chatting to the vicar. The vicar says he has a lot to thank Del for as he bought nothing but luck. The vicar says he also bought the weather with him, every time he predicts another miracle, the statue to weep, it has been pouring with rain. Suddenly the vicar twigs and runs behind the statue, he sees water dripping down the back, and dripping off a light. He frogmarches Del Boy up the church tower and shows him a gaping hole in the roof. Someone has stolen the lead. Rodney says the vicar is in luck as him and Del have a lot of lead in their garage, but Del quietly tells Rodney to keep schtum. Father O'Keefe then says this is what Del bought off Paddy The Greek and Sunglasses Ron, the stolen lead from the church roof.
He then shouts at Del saying for the sake of a small decrepit old building, Del created a tissue of lies and that he deliberately and willingly set out to defraud all those newspapers and TV companies out of thousands and thousands of pounds. He then pats Del on the head and says "God Bless You My Son".
Outside the church, Rodney is met by Biffo who wants to know where his trumpet is. Rodney manages to distract Biffo then runs off, Biffo chasing him. Del asks the local paparazzi if they would like to see some authentic inner city violence, and if so bring their wallets now. Del tells Rodney not to run away so fast.
- Derek "Del Boy" Trotter - David Jason
- Rodney Trotter - Nicholas Lyndhurst
- Albert Trotter - Buster Merryfield
- Father O'Keith - P.G. Stephens
- Australian news reporter - Peter Wickham
- American news reporter - Carol Cleveland
- Biffo - John Pierce Jones
Previous Episode From Prussia With Love (31st August 1986)Edit
Next Episode The Longest Night (14th September 1986)Edit
- The idea for the script goes all the way back five years earlier to "The Second Time Around", where Grandad told Rodney about how Del used to donate to the church roof fund.
- The scene where Rodney sprinkles Del's aftershave over Albert's kipper was done without telling Buster Merryfield. Thus, his reaction to the kipper's aftershave taste was genuine. Reportedly, Merryfield was initially irritated by this.
- How would dripping water conveniently drip right onto the statue's eyes and make it look like it is weeping, if that only happened during rainfall, how come no one noticed the dripping? Also the statue was leaning forward, meaning the top of the head would stop the water falling onto the eyes.